Banana Whine

I had a hard night. It was rough. I fell asleep sometime around 4 a.m. I had high hopes of sleeping in, but my daughters had a different idea.

5:48 a.m. – Both girls come into my room. Mgazi crawls in bed. Zaffy 
asks if she can watch tv.

6:17 a.m. – Mgazi crawls OVER me, to get out of my side of the bed so
 she can join her sister watching tv.

6:45 a.m. – Mgazi comes into my room.

Mgazi: Mom, I’m hungry. I want breakfast.

Me: Got get yourself a banana.

Mgazi: Awwww. Just a banana?

6:54 a.m. – Mgazi comes back in my room.

Mgazi: Mommy, the banana is gross.

Me: Why? What does it taste like?

Mgazi: I don’t know. Zaffy is not strong enough to open it.

7:05: a.m. - Zaffy & Mgazi come into my room.

Zaffy: Mommy, I can’t open my banana or Mgazi’s and they look gross.

7:33 a.m. – Mgazi comes in.

Mgazi: Mommy, Zaffy’s tooth hurts. She can’t open her 
banana and I need some breakfast.

Me: Ok. Did you eat your banana?

Mgazi: Yes. I ate the whole thing. Zaffy finally got it open. It was gross.

Defeated, I get up to make the girls some breakfast. Mgazi watches me with an eagle eye. She counts the number of items on each plate.

Mgazi: Zaffy gets 1, 2, 3 ,4 things. I get 1, 2, 3 
things. Mommy, why does Zaffy get 4 things and I only get 3 things?

Me: Gaz, what’s on Zaff’s plate that is not on yours?

Mgazi: A banana.

Glass of white wineRecommended wine: I recommend banana wine, of course. Yes, it exists. All you need is 21 lbs of RIPE bananas, 5 gallons water and 15-20 lbs white and/or brown sugar, and some golden raisins.

Here’s a couple of sites that can help you with the recipe:

I Smell Like What?

Yesterday was the first day in many months where I didn’t wake up dreading my day. In fact, I was very pleasantly nuzzled awake by my adorable daughter, Zaffron. She gently slipped herself under the bed covers, snuggled her body into mine and cooed and clucked little noises that reminded me of when she was a baby. The last few months have been difficult and I was immediately grateful for this precious little bit of love. That is, until she said,

“Mommy, you smell terrible. You smell like hot chicken.”

Glass of white wineRecommended wine: When I think “hot,” I think of the beach. When I think “chicken,” I think Sauvignon Blanc. So, today I recommend The Beach House White. It’s from South Africa. It’s actually 80% Sauvignon Blanc and 20% Semillon which is fun, and it’s wickedly inexpensive.

We Don’t Bite our Mommies!

Zaffron's first joke

I can't believe this sweet child bit me!

A few days ago I was carrying Zaffron, who is 1 1/2 years old, to the bedroom to change her diaper. As we turned the corner into her room, she bit me on the shoulder. I was astonished. She had never done that before. I was also very mad.

I put her on the changing table and took the opportunity to lecture her a bit as I changed her diaper. “We don’t bite our mommies,” I scolded.

She stared at me. Silent.

“We don’t bite our friends.” She continued to stare. She blinked which I took to mean, “please continue, Mother,” so I did, with “We only bite food, Zaffron. Do you understand?”

She opened her mouth wide in response and bared her teeth. Deliberately and ever-so-slowly, she closed her mouth on my arm… gently pressing her teeth into my skin. She used just enough pressure to let me know that she knew exactly what she was doing but still too little pressure to qualify as actual biting. She cocked an eyebrow and puased — I think for effect, because I was stunned into silence, afraid to move a muscle. Zaffron pulled away, smiled, pointed her thin little finger at my arm and said, “Apple?”

My baby’s first joke.

Glass of white wineRecommended Wine: I don’t know anything about wine… except that I like it. If your child ever bites you, I suggest you immediately pour yourself a glass of Riesling.