I’m 42 and Not Diggin’ It

This is how I react when someone calls me “ma’am.”

Let’s just jump right in. I turned 42 years old last week. I am not happy about it. Let’s talk about why:

  • I sweat for no reason at all. I swear I this didn’t happen to me when I was 41.
  • I have crow’s feet.  Crows feet suck.
  • I now have to wear makeup. It started when I turned 40. I hate it. It takes up valuable time each morning and because I never wore it before, I’m horrible at putting it on and have to rely on my 30-something friends to guide me. It’s humiliating. And I resent it. (For my girlfriends… the ones saying, “oh, poor you, just started wearing makeup at forty,” shut up. This is my list. (p.s. I love you guys.))
  • I have four grey hairs and no matter how many times I pull them out, they reappear the next day. All four. Three on my head and one… somewhere else.
  • I put ice cubes in my wine to water it down. I don’t even know why I do this, but I associate it with being old.
  • I’m embarrassed if I walk by a Hollister store and they have one of the shirtless male models standing at the entrance. (Where are his pants? Does his mother know about this? Oh God, why can’t I make myself look away?)
  • I sweat if I walk within a hundred yards of a Hollister store in anticipation that they might have one of the shirtless male models standing at the entrance. Can anyone say coo coo ca-choo?
  • My favorite clothes have come into style and gone out of style five times. (Currently, they’re out.)
  • Harrison Ford is 70. I still think he’s hot.
  • More grocery store clerks than not call me Ma’am. What the %^$&?
  • Last, but not least, everything pisses me off. And I feel justified about it somehow. Like it’s a right of mine to be mad at everything because I’ve earned it by living this long. I’m just like a grumpy old woman – the exact kind of grumpy old woman that pissed me off when I was younger.

Wow. I’m exhausted. (See… I’m so old that making lists exhausts me!)

With that said, I do feel the need to mention this. I’m more comfortable in my skin than I’ve ever been. (I just don’t like how droopy it is!) I have more confidence than ever before too. I don’t have fewer problems. In fact, this year, I’m facing more challenges than last. It hasn’t been easy. But I have more belief in my ability to handle what comes my way. This gives me confidence which gives me courage. Two traits I would not have used to describe myself only a year ago.

I think I’ll write more on this later. I’m tired. It’s 8:45 p.m.

24 insightful thoughts by 24 brilliant people

  1. Just randomly clicked on you from the blog hop, and I think I love you already! I’m 42, as well, and I am hot all. the. time! It sucks! I have more than four gray hairs and have since I was 21 (double the time – imagine that!). And I have decided that since I have room in my closet, I’m just going to keep all of my clothes. They’ll be cool again eventually. However, whether I will be able to fit into them is another question.

    • Kathy — I’ve read some of your story. It’s not often that I come across a blog that makes me stop and think for more than a moment or two. Yours did and I’m grateful.

      Thank you!

    • Amen! I love that kind of validation! In Hawaii we say ʻĀmene.

      Another interesting tidbit: our state fish was the Humuhumunukunukuapuaa until 2006.

      Unrelated but still fun, no?

    • Kendall, thank you for the support! Im glad you think it’s funny. I rarely laugh out loud these days… can’t cough, sneeze, do jumping jacks.

      Heck, if I even type LOL I’m taking a risk! *smile*


  2. Lol!!! You look mighty fine for a 42 year old! I get more of your worries & I’m only 35. Gravity is slowly being unfriendly towards me. Everything’s going down, down, down.

  3. Hi Found you on Bloggy Moms I love your article. I’m 43(and I’m not diggin it, LOL) but its nice to know I’m not losing it cause you pretty much described exactly how Ive been feeling about things lately.

  4. I turned 42 this past June. I hear ya sister on most everything – except the confidence part. My kids are much older (20, 18 and 16 – yes I started young) and now I’m getting the empty nest feeling too. Don’t know why the confidence isn’t there, but I regularly medicate it with exotic beer and jujubes. Oh, and now I can’t see either, damn arms are getting longer, I used to love to tease my dad about that. One of the best things though – I can text my oldest – ‘bring momma home something special, and by special I mean beer’.

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